Remember last week when I was as cool as a cucumober…this week not so much. I’m in full anxiety, pre-marathon freak out mode.
I could spend an entire post talking about how I am panicking about running a marathon on Sunday BUT I thought that would kind of be boring for you to read and unproductive for me to write. So instead I have a dating/running post for y’all.
How Tapering is Like A Break Up
1. SHOCK: What the hell just happened? Two weeks ago I was running 54 miles in a week, now I’m barely running at all. Just like in a break-up, you go through a period of SHOCK. Is this really happening?
2. FREEDOM. No more running? No more awful boyfriend holding me back? (Remember you broke up for a reason). This is the best thing that could happen!! You start looking up new things to do on the internet: Indie Movies, Trapeze Class, or Walking Tours of the City. You have SO MUCH TIME.
3. DENIAL. You probably start thinking, “Do I really need to taper?” or “Is our relationship really over?” You try a couple short taper runs, which ultimately leaves you wanting more. Forget the break-up, YOU WANT RUNNING BACK.
4. SADNESS. Maybe even Tears. You start listening to your Break-up mix on your iPod and tears starts streaming down your face. You start thinking about the good ol’ days (those 18 and 20 milers). You aren’t even in denial anymore…You are a Full On BASKET CASE.
5. SELF DOUBT and FEAR. Did I do enough? Did I give it my all during the relationship (OR training runs)? Was there something more I could have done? Could I have gone faster in my tempo runs? Am I good enough? Your anxiety sky rockets. You start having hot flashes.
6. FOOD: You start eating everything in sight. I mean you broke up (or can’t run)? Who cares what you eat? EAT YOUR FEELINGS. DO IT. It feels soo much better.
6(b). You start freaking out that you ate too much. What if we get back together? (OR What about the marathon?) How am I suppose to run a marathon after gaining 10 pounds? FUUUCCCCCKKKKKKK.
7. ACCEPTANCE. You learn to deal with it. Tapering (The Break-Up) is happening. It’s not the end of the world. You move on. Luckily with tapering, you have a Marathon to look forward to. And the taper only lasts two weeks. Unfortunately, a bad break-up can last wayyyy longer than two weeks (sooooo Good Luck With That).
MY MARATHON ACCEPTANCE: